That proves, "If the Foo $h!+$, Wear It". <G>

Classic! I first heard/colected that jokle back in '95, from the FUNNY echo, posted by a guy Im' friends with to this day -- he's in New Zealand -- we chat online & send each other funnies regularly. . .

I'm no stranger to handling emergency traffic, but I'd rather not have
to.

I couldnot tale over & diretc traffic in an emergency -- never having driven, I dno't know the rights of wya rules, except the one: The 6'8" well-muscled bearded guy with dual gun racks n his truck, eaxgh with a very expensive, double barrel shotgun, in the guiant 4X4 truck with a bumper sticker that says,"Guns don't kill people -- _I_ kill people!" always has the right of way.

Not a lot of this in Canada.. .

Like the commercial saying "It doesn't get any better than this". One
pastor said "That's true -- it's all downhill from here". :P

Yup, I've reached the top, & I'm over the hill, which is great - it's a downhill trip the rest of the way!

Jesus never said he'sd ultimately turn againsy him -- only a three-time
betrayal, which implies he knew Peter would repent of it.

Judas was the one who turned against Him.

Of course, Jesus had to cajole Judas to play the prophecied part, but Judas turned his heart to it for real (gladly taking the betrayal cash, along with the disciples' funds)

All happened as it was supposed to.

Where does it say Peter requested to be crucified upside down?

That's tradition...it's not noted in the Scriptures. Except for the
Apostle John, who died of natural causes, all the others were martyred,
and died horrible deaths.

I knew that but I thought it was Stephen who wascrucified upside-down.

Find an oblong piece of wood. Put it in your living room. Walk
around it as often as you like & you can honestly tell people, "I
walked around the block x times this morning."

For that matter, get a concrete block, and do the same thing. <G>

That's heavier to move around.

Lots of decent kids, still.

There may be...I sure haven't seen them.

Location, location,. location.

True story (Google image search for it) Their welcome billboard says
"New York City is big, but we're Biggar."

In this case, size does matter. <G>

A Canadiamn comedy music group, The Arrogant Worms, wrote a new anthem for Canadam, called "Canada's Really Big" including the lyric: "It's not what you do ewith it; it's the size that counts"

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CP wrote --

I knew that but I thought it was Stephen who wascrucified upside-down.

Stephen was not an apostle but early convert who was stoned to death.
The first martyr.
Joe
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George,

That proves, "If the Foo $h!+$, Wear It". <G>

Classic! I first heard/colected that jokle back in '95, from the FUNNY echo, posted by a guy Im' friends with to this day -- he's in New
Zealand -- we chat online & send each other funnies regularly. . .

The beauty of puns is in the groan of the recipients.

I couldnot tale over & diretc traffic in an emergency -- never having driven, I dno't know the rights of wya rules, except the one: The 6'8" well-muscled bearded guy with dual gun racks n his truck, eaxgh with a very expensive, double barrel shotgun, in the guiant 4X4 truck with a bumper sticker that says,"Guns don't kill people -- _I_ kill people!" always has the right of way.

That's like the one where the woman who was behind a daydreaming driver.
The woman ended up missing the traffic light, and had to sit and wait for another light cycle. She started cussing, flipping the other driver off,
and she is immediately told by a cop "Step out of the car, please"...as
she's arrested.

A few hours later, she's released, with an apology from the officer.
He noted "With your behavior toward that other driver, despite having
bumper stickers on your car saying 'Follow Me To Church', I thought
you had stolen the car". <G>

Yup, I've reached the top, & I'm over the hill, which is great - it's a
downhill trip the rest of the way!

As the late Bobby Bowden noted, "After retirement, there's only one big
event left".

Of course, Jesus had to cajole Judas to play the prophecied part, but Judas turned his heart to it for real (gladly taking the betrayal
cash, along with the disciples' funds)

And, he betrayed Him with a kiss.

All happened as it was supposed to.

Yep.

I knew that but I thought it was Stephen who was crucified upside-down.

No, Stephen was stoned to death...and not by smoking weed or heavy
drinking. :P

For that matter, get a concrete block, and do the same thing. <G>

That's heavier to move around.

No pain, no gain. <G>

A Canadiamn comedy music group, The Arrogant Worms, wrote a new anthem
for Canadam, called "Canada's Really Big" including the lyric: "It's
not what you do with it; it's the size that counts"

They have a point.

Daryl

... Some people have more problems than an arithmetic book.
=== MultiMail/Win v0.52
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The beauty of puns is in the groan of the recipients.

Yup. I try for the best groans, not the "ho hum, not you again" ones. . .

That's like the one where the woman who was behind a daydreaming driver.
The woman ended up missing the traffic light, and had to sit and wait for another light cycle. She started cussing, flipping the other driver off,
and she is immediately told by a cop "Step out of the car, please"...as
she's arrested.
A few hours later, she's released, with an apology from the officer.
He noted "With your behavior toward that other driver, despite having
bumper stickers on your car saying 'Follow Me To Church', I thought
you had stolen the car". <G>

A cop member of my old church told that one from up front, tyo the congregation. Food for thought, indeed. Be who you're supposed to be, don't just talk the talk.

As the late Bobby Bowden noted, "After retirement, there's only one big
event left".

Yuppers.

My line, when the subject of aging comes up is 'getting old beats the alternative."

Womeb usually say, "I'd rather stay young."; I say, "That's not the alternative!" & look at them until they get that "Aha!" moment.

A Canadian comedy music group, The Arrogant Worms, wrote a new anthem
for Canada, called "Canada's Really Big" including the lyric: "It's
not what you do with it; it's the size that counts"

They have a point.

Look it up for a laugh. . . :)

Another kind of pun is the shaggy dog story. . .

Erik was getting on in life. Despite his rapidly failing eyesight he wants to lead one more raid on England and gets his wife's blessing. At the dockside before he sets sail he asks her if there's anything she wants him to bring back?

'Yes' she says 'the English houses all have stainles steel sinks, I'd love one of those!'

'No problem my love, I'll be back in a month, with your stainless steel sink!'

Off they sail and soon Erik is reliving his youth, pillaging and fighting, helped by the younger men that have to point him in the right direction every so often. Finally the day comes when their long ship is full of treasure and Erik decides its time to go home. One of his men asks Erik

'Did you get what you're wife asked for... stainless steel something or other?'... 'sink!' says another viking 'it's made of shiny metal and she'll want it to put water in to wash the dishes!'

'No I forgot! Thanks for reminding me! There's some houses being built over there, I'll be able to grab one from there. I'll only be a few minutes, you lot get ready to cast off!'

Off Erik goes and looks in vain for a sink. Finally he spots something that might be a sink resting against a pile of bricks. It's made from shiny metal and looks like it could hold water. He grabs it and gets back on the ship glad to be going home after his successful raid.

Eventually they reach their home port and there to greet him is his wife... 'well, did you get my sink!?'
'Off course I did my love... here it is!'
'What the he'll are you giving me that for? That's not a sink, that's one of those things builders use for carrying bricks you old fool!'

Any way, it just goes to show you the old saying is true, 'A hod's as good as a sink to a blind Norse!'


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Daryl wrote --

... Some people have more problems than an arithmetic book.

++Swipe++
Joe


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CP wrote --

Any way, it just goes to show you the old saying is true, 'A hod's as good as a sink to a blind Norse!'

GROANNNNN
Joe


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