SGT. NIMROD
I was working in Army security when a VIP from another base called to
ask to whom he should address an important letter. Knowing my tough-to-spell last name would give him fits, I said, "Just put down Sergeant Gary, as my last name is too hard." The next day, I received a letter addressed to Sgt. Gary Toohard. G. C., via mail
STANDING VIOLATION
Sign above the toilet in a women's latrine at Camp Ripley in Minnesota: "If you are reading this sign while using this latrine, you are in the wrong one." Mike Lins, Savage, Minnesota
My husband interrupted. "Honey, when I said 'dirty magazines,' I meant
the clips from their rifles hadn't been cleaned."
NO-SENSE SENSOR
A military base commander called to complain that the
weather-forecasting software our company created for them kept
reporting unexplainable wind shifts. "Do you know where the sensor is located?" my coworker asked. "Of course," he responded. "It's where we park the helicopters." Angelo Giordano, Bellevue, Nebraska
SGT. NIMROD
I was working in Army security when a VIP from another base called to ask to whom he should address an important letter. Knowing my tough-to-spell last name would give him fits, I said, "Just put down Sergeant Gary, as my last name is too hard." The next day, I received a letter addressed to Sgt. Gary Toohard. G. C., via mail
WHAT REALLY MATTERS
Going over our weekly training schedule one morning at our small Army garrison, we noticed that our annual trip to the rifle range had been canceled for the second time, but that our semi-annual physical-fitness test was still on as planned. "Does it bother anyone else," one soldier asked, "that the Army doesn't seem concerned with how well we can shoot, yet is extremely interested in how fast we can run?"
UNCLEAN
Soon after being transferred to a new duty station, my Marine husband called home one evening to tell me he would be late. "Dirty magazines were discovered in the platoon quarters," he said, "and the whole squad is being disciplined."
Hopefully the magazines weren't S&M, B&D themed!)
Playboy are coming out with a new magazine, especially for married men. Every month it's exactly the same woman.
They opened up a stand selling flowers, but Heff called the 5-0 and got them shut down. They said they would've gotten away with it anywhere else.. But I guess only Hugh can stop florist friars.
Drill Sergeant: I didnĘt see you at the camouflage drill today Soldier: Sir! Thank You, Sir!
it's a "safe haven" for kids to come and trick-or-treat. He said he
had over 200 pounds of candy to give out.
To me, that's a pimple proliferation, sugar rush, and caffeine
high!!
Playboy are coming out with a new magazine, especially for married men.There is a topic in advertising called "Subliminal Seduction"...and a
Every month it's exactly the same woman.
book by the same name that I read in college over 40 years ago (and I
still have that book). It basically showed how you can be sexually
aroused by an ad picture, especially with ads for alcoholic beverages.
The point was illustrated by the following:
Q: What's the sexiest thing in Playboy magazine??
A: Clue. Forget about the centerfold.
Drill Sergeant: I didnĘt see you at the camouflage drill today Soldier:If I EVER called my Sgt "sir" I got a SERIOUS ass chewing. Only Officers are called sir. Non-coms are addressed by their rank, because THEY work for a living. :)
Sir! Thank You, Sir!
I give up, what is the sexirest thing in Playboy magazine. I'd answer,
it depends on which issue it is. . . I prefered Hustler over Playboy
back in my teens. Outgrew them all soon after. . .
I think both Hugh Hefner (Playboy) and Larry Flynt (Hustler) are dead
and gone now.
That is correct. From what I have heard, Hefner's sons inherited the magazine and sort of destroyed it.
George,
I give up, what is the sexirest thing in Playboy magazine. I'd answer,The alcoholic beverage ads, with all their subliminal deals to sexually arouse you.
it depends on which issue it is. . . I prefered Hustler over Playboy
back in my teens. Outgrew them all soon after. . .
I think both Hugh Hefner (Playboy) and Larry Flynt (Hustler) are dead
and gone now.
Yup, obscenity is defined by that which is intended to arouse but has
no redeeming artistic value - those ads certainly qualify, but
tasteful images of women the way God made them are not. . .
I think both Hugh Hefner (Playboy) and Larry Flynt (Hustler) are dead
and gone now.
Yup. . . Hugh quite recently. . .
You've heard of the adult magazines for clergymen? Prayboy
You've heard of the adult magazines for clergymen? PrayboyNo wonder there's so much sexual sin in the church...and they try to cover
it up. Yet, The Lord has seen it all...David's little affair with Bathsheba, while tragic...was nothing compared to what is going on now.
And for centuries, the forest remained as lush and pretty as it once
was, all because of one man and his re-seeding heir-line.
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