• How Do They Survive?

    From Daryl Stout@316:36/20 to All on Mon Nov 13 00:04:15 2017
    Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the
    menu that you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12
    Chicken McNuggets. I asked for a half dozen nuggets.

    "We don't have half dozen nuggets," said the
    teenager at the counter.

    "You don't?" I replied.

    "We only have six, nine, or twelve," was the reply.

    "So I can't order a half-dozen nuggets, but I can
    order six?"

    "That's right."

    So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets.


    The paragraph above doesn't amaze me because of what
    happened a couple of months ago. I was checking out
    at the local Foodland with just a few items and the
    lady behind me put her things on the belt close to
    mine. I picked up one of those "Dividers" that they
    keep by the cash register and placed it between our
    things so they wouldn't get mixed. After the girl
    had scanned all of my items, she picked up the
    "Divider" looking it all over for the bar code so
    she could scan it. Not finding the bar code she said
    to me "Do you know how much this is?" and I said to
    her "I've changed my mind, I don't think I'll buy
    that today." She said "OK" and I paid her for the
    things and left. She had no clue to what had just



    A lady at work was seen putting a credit card into
    her floppy drive and quickly. When inquired as to
    what she was doing, she said she was shopping on the
    Internet and they kept asking for a credit card
    number, so she was using the ATM "thingy"....


    I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping
    beside her car. "Do you need some help?" I asked.
    She replied, "I knew I should have replaced the
    battery to this remote door unlock. Now I can't get
    into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a
    distant convenient store) would have a battery to
    fit this?" "Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm
    too?" She handed it and the car keys to me. As I
    took the key and manually unlocked the door, I
    replied, "Why don't you drive over there and check
    about the batteries it's a long walk."


    Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too
    swift. One day she was typing and turned to a
    secretary and said, "I'm almost out of typing paper.
    What do I do?" "Just use copier machine paper," the
    secretary told her. With that, the intern took her
    last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the
    photocopier and proceeded to make five "blank" copies.


    IDIOTS AT WORK... Sign in a gas station: Coke -- 49
    cents. Two for a dollar.


    IDIOTS & COMPUTERS My neighbor works in the
    operations department in the central office of a
    large bank. Employees in the field call him when
    they have problems with their computers. One night
    he got a call from a woman in one of the branch
    banks who had this question: "I've got smoke coming
    from the back of my terminal. Do you guys have a
    fire downtown?"


    IDIOTS ARE EASY TO PLEASE I was sitting in my
    science class, when the teacher commented that the
    next day would be the shortest day of the year. My
    lab partner became visibly excited, cheering and
    clapping. I explained to her that the amount of
    daylight changes, not the actual amount of time.
    Needless to say, she was very disappointed.


    Police in Radnor, Pennsylvania, interrogated a
    suspect by placing a metal colander on his head and
    connecting it with wires to a photocopy machine. The
    message "He's lying" was placed in the copier, and
    police pressed the copy button each time they
    thought the suspect wasn't telling the truth.
    Believing the "lie detector" was working the suspect

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